I always wanted to be a mom. When I was a little girl, I played house with my dolls.  I would pretend to feed them and change their diapers. I would wrap them up in blankets and carry them around the house. When I got a little older, I would help our neighbors with their […]

Just today I was having coffee with a friend and I told her about this blog post. I wrote it on the plane to Las Vegas on November 10th 2016, the day before Eliza went to heaven. I started this blog and finished it on the flight but I never had the chance to post it. I think about it some […]

I miss Eliza so much and the holidays are so much more difficult than last year. I must have been in shock last last year because I don’t remember any of these feelings. This year I want to buy her presents, I want to drive around looking at Christmas lights and take her to Christmas […]

November, I’ve been dreading you. I’ve watched the calendar all year, I’ve counted the days but their is no way to get around it… you’re here. November will never again be the month of Election Day or Veterans Day, my Dad’s birthday, Thanksgiving or Black Friday. It will forever be the month my precious little girl […]

As I sat in my therapists office this week I sobbed. I had piles of tissues in my lap, my eyes were puffy and my head was pounding. It’s like that every week. I unload, I share things that I haven’t shared with anyone. It actually feels like work, and afterwards I just want to […]